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Man Defecates the State of Washington

By Scooter

MADISON, Wisc. — “It really wasn’t that unbelievable,” Buck Downer, a local bricklayer said. “I just looked down, and there it was. No coincidence at all.” What Downer referred to was his recent defecation experience, which rendered an unlikely result: a turd that resembled the state of Washington exactly. Along with Downer, respected doctors... »

Air Quality in Hell Better than in Washington

By Scooter

SEATTLE, Wash. – A recent report indicated that the air quality in Washington State is far worse than any other state. The air is so bad, in fact, that many researchers have declared that the air is better in Hell than in the Evergreen State. Why the air is so bad is actually not... »

Jonas Brothers Buy Space Needle

By Scooter

SEATTLE – Early this week, Seattleites welcomed Paul, Nick and Joseph Jonas to their new home, the Space Needle. Also revealed was the fact that a deal had been in the works for several weeks securing Seattle’s most precious monument for its favorite band. “We are a very proud city,” Mayor Greg Nickels stated... »

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Nickle’s Random Fact

Coffee beans are not beans. They are fruit pits.

Finally…


M.C. Fox's dream has come true. He finally defeated Career Mode on Forza Motorsport 3. This moment has been a long time coming, and through his perseverance, he can finally call himself "Forza Champion". More to come soon.

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Hampton at the Movies

Secret Twist Ending to The Last Airbender Revealed

My experience as an expert movie reviewer has only taught me three things. The first is that sequels are horrible unless they are a part of a trilogy. Then usually one of them is still horrible. Secondly, there is always room for a cheerleader. Thirdly, M. Night... Read More

Scooter says, "Oh well, SpaghettiOs!"