The Art of Being Man-Man
For maximum enjoyment, play this track while reading:
THE HOUSE – “You better Man-Man up or go lie down, bag ape,” M.C. Fox responds to those who struggle with their training. Fox is identified as the official Man-Man of The House. The Man-Man movement started when Fox noticed a lighthouse collection accumulating in the Corner Room. His solution: a Predator poster erected upon the door indefinitely.
With intense vigor, Fox devoutly drafted the laws for The Conservation of Man-Man Principle. When asked about the principles, Horner casually replied, “it’s all about the 2 P’s: Protein and Predator.” To become Man-Man, one must identify with those who have achieved the level of Man-Man status. Identification occurs during intense meditation in front of The Predator Poster while chanting Kumate. After several hours, Fox was able to separate his mind from the external world and become one with those who are disciplined in Man-Man.
The House recognizes such heroes as Julian, Bill Paxton, Jean-Claude Van Damme, and Rambo, among many others. “Man-Man training takes time, effort, and commitment. You just don’t become that way over night,” trainee Wiggs confirms. “It is the most intense training I’ve ever encountered.”
Fox tries to extend his knowledge to the local youth population when the opportunity is presented. “They know I’m coming when they hear the Fletch theme song heading their way,” he said. “Most the time they run though.”
“It seems common for people to feel distressed by this lifestyle,” explains Nickle. “It’s really not for everyone.”
For those preparing their journey, Fox advises trainees to gradually increase their protein intake. Protein is essential for the rigorous exercise accompanied with the training. He recommends putting in Forza Motorsport racing hours as study time. Staying hydrated is also greatly stressed. Protein and liquids are crucial for the health of any Man-Man. As long as an individual follows the principles of Man-Manism and stays committed, a sense of ultra masculine nirvana can be attained.