Ninja Gives State of The House Address

Thursday, February 4, 2010
By Nichole
Ninja delivered his State of The House address to a crowded Kitchen.

Ninja delivered his State of The House address to a crowded Kitchen.

THE KITCHEN– The State of The House address was given recently by elected Kitty of the Year, Ninja, to a fully-packed House conference session. The speech was given on the floor of The Kitchen, where Ninja sat tall and erect on a stool at The Kitchen counter. As always, the presiding officer, Princess Sophia Banana-Hammock, also Ninja’s rumored mistress, sat directly behind him as he addressed The House’s current problems.

Among the topics Ninja covered in his speech were proposals for House deficit reduction, more importation of goods, and health care reform.  It has been said by many House members that Ninja’s love for chicken put The House under financially. His economic goals now circulate around cutting back spending to lower the deficit, so The House can continue to import more chicken.

Following the speech, Lionelle stood up to deliver the opposing response from the floor of The Kitchen. Lionelle questioned Ninja’s ability to deliver his promises, citing health care reform as an example. Ninja plans on investing in building cleaner litter box facilities, yet Lionelle claims his inability to stick to one litter box is the cause for the dirty bathrooms’ condition.

House members also doubt Ninja’s proposals for deficit reduction. “How can we save money when Ninja demands more and more chicken each day?” questions speech attendee Nichole Stevens. “I don’t know what more Ninja can do about the deficit. He already cut funding to most of The House research programs” Jeff L. Horner posted on his blog earlier. Ninja has cut The Blue House’s space exploration funding in attempts to cut back spending, while talk about Lionelle’s airline proposition, called Air Kitty, is gaining popularity.

Lionelle's complementary mimosa's serve as a popular attraction on Air Kitty.

Lionelle's complementary mimosa's serve as a popular attraction on Air Kitty.

Despite criticism towards Ninja’s decisions as elected Kitty of the Year, he still has a strong network of supporters standing behind him, including all of The Corner Room. As far as The East Wing is concerned, Lionelle’s support is growing every day.

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