Whirlpool Arrives at Blue House
The new Whirlpool promises a clean future for The House's dishes.
THE KITCHEN – A new fragrance was detected in the air of The Blue House Kitchen. The smell was almost indistinguishable, but still determined as the scent, of a new dishwasher. The Whirlpool’s arrival was greeted by Blue House members with much anticipation and relief. Its delayed homecoming was an inconvenience shared by all House inhabitants. “This new dishwasher is really going to save on the cost of lotion. My hands have been incredibly dry after all that manual washing. I welcome the new dishwasher with open arms,” Nichole exclaimed about the Whirlpool.
Attempts were made to lessen the load, as M.C Fox supplied the house with plastic plates and cups. “I guess some idiots just don’t get the hint around here,” Fox told The Blue House Lives regarding his purchase. “Even if you put the plastic [cups] right in front of the glass ones, they’ll still use the glass.” Most House members opted for take-out, rather than live without a dishwasher. “I realize now how much we took the dishwasher for granted, and how tedious of a job it had to do,” acknowledged senior House resident Scooter. “Not only did it tie The Kitchen together, but it also functioned as the heart of The Kitchen,” he continued on to explain.
The House was definitely thrilled to get a new one.
The excitement surrounding the first wash was said to be compared to the same emotions experienced at the grand opening of the Tacoma Dome (or Sunsphere, depending on your region). What happened next, though, would have devastated even a nihilist. The first load was discovered to be a failure. House member Nichole was the first to start the wash, claiming she had rinsed the dishes thoroughly before placing them in the care of the Whirlpool. As M.C Fox started to put the assumed clean dishes back in their designated storage area, he noticed not all of the dishes had met Blue House standards for cleanliness. Disappointment and outrage was had by all.
Residents hope the dishwasher will overcome its initial struggles.
The question of whether The Kitchen will remain dishwasherless is undetermined. Worry has spread throughout The House concerning proper sanitation, food consumption, trash production, and moisturizer investments. “We’ll just have to dirty up some more dishes for practice runs until the newbie dishwasher can get it right,” M.C Fox declared earlier. For now, that’s all The House can do.
Sept. 3, 1802
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After initial investigation and research of the aforementioned article, The Green House has come to the conclusion that the “Dishwasher” was NOT at fault for its substandard performance. Human error was the most probable cause for the “Dishwasher’s” poor initial performance.
Final review of this investigation resulted the findings of AHE (Absolute Human Error).
AHE, in the form of failing to properly and thoroughly “rinse, scrape, scrub, rinse”, the plates, cups, utensils, and other food consumption apparatus was the cause of this failure.