This week, BH Cinema is proud to present Curse of the Golden Flower, the Chinese epic directed by Zhang Yimou. Nickle heralds this movie as "pretty good". Scooter has viewed the poster art and wholeheartedly agrees.
The Porch Invaded
“This war is ripening. It’s constantly progressing,” The Blue House Lives junior war correspondent related earlier today. It appears the Kitty Konflict is starting to take shape and its definitions forming. Today, Ninja, however, attempt to deliver a decisive blow by invading the pro-Lionelle territory known as The Porch. War strategians were torn as to the practicality of such a move. One expert describes, “This is a very risky move. Ninja was rested and fortified at Study Window. He had scored the first victory. Why take a defensive position and transform it into an offensive?” Another expert, however, praised Ninja’s bravery, stating, “He has courage. That I cannot deny. Perhaps, he should not have waited so long, though.”
Ninja throws caution to the wind and invades The Porch.
Ninja’s delay in allowing Lionelle to retreat her stronghold on The Porch may have had significant implications. When Ninja reached The Porch after a long and steady march, Lionelle was positioned atop a mesa and possessed complete control of the high ground. When Ninja arrived, he was already fatigued. He settled on a hill referred to by the locals was Window Ledge and contemplated a maneuver. Unlike Study Window, however, Lionelle sat firm was awaited Ninja’s attack. Ninja knew he could not sit still, and Lionelle was not going to be wavered by intimidation. After such a long march, inaction would be a gross failure.
Therefore, Ninja advanced upon Lionelle’s left flank. Battle pundits believe that he was trying to force her to into a confrontation behind a 650 gallon pond that accentuates The Porch’s landscape. If successful, he could have swept her up and over the mesa and out through Window Ledge. The Blue House Lives chief kitty correspondent, Jeff L. Horner, reported, “If Ninja could have captured The Porch, this war might be over. He and Lionelle would be at the negotiating table right now, and Lionelle would have no other option but unconditional surrender. Imagine if Lee would have won at Gettysburg. My, how different things would have been.”
Lionelle controls The Porch by standing firm.
Lionelle, however, stood like a statue atop her mesa and refused to take Ninja’s bait at the flank. Ninja had to face a stark realization: Lionelle would not relinquish the high ground. His movement at her flank had produced no results, no bloodshed, and no victory. It appeared that Ninja would fall back to Window Ledge entangled in a gritty stalemate.
Yet, Lionelle, ever the opportunist, saw an opening as Ninja stood bewildered at her left flank. A large sound rose from the distance and Ninja stood petrified with his large yellow eyes gaping. As the sound grew nearer, he began a slow, unconscious retreat. It was then, at that exact moment, that it became visible. A large white van cruised down the street just off Lionelle’s flank just outside the palisades of The Porch. Upon spotting the van, Ninja raced back at full retreat. This was Lionelle’s secret artillery, the white van that produced a deafening noise more frightening than a Carthaginian war elephant. Ninja sped past Window Ledge, and early reports indicate that he fled all the way back to his fortifications at Study Window. The day proved an overwhelming victory for Lionelle.
Ninja, with eyes wide and frightened, flees through Window Ledge.
“The largest development from this battle is that now both sides stand equally strong and prepared for a long engagement. This war could drag for God knows how long now,” one war expert speculates. As both sides sit high above, secure in their positions, the world can only watch now. Each side has attempted an invasion of the other’s stronghold, and both have failed. Now the two sides, it seems, will dig and prepare for a long war of attrition. No matter the outcome, though, the bravery and fortitude displayed in the fledgling days of this war are a standing testament to the characters of these two felines. While there will prove to be much horror to come, there will be large amounts of glory as well. As the two parties contemplate their next moves, one high up at Study Window and one staring down from the mesa on The Porch, they both sit like angels. But, if they are truly angels, they must be killer angels.
Related Stories:
July 23, 2009 – Fur Flies at Study Window
July 20, 2009 – Lionelle and Ninja go to War
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